Talk to Me! About Sex, Love, and Life
Did you enjoy asking and answering these Talk To Me questions? Do you want more?
Order this book by visiting
or contact
.
To make a gift to support Planned Parenthood of the Great Northwest’s programs, please contact
or call 866-674-2538.
Remember Branwen?
Let’s hear what her dad
has to say!
Chris van Daalen attended an All About Puberty
program with his daughter. Here is his story:
Q: How did attending a PPGNW Family Program with
your child influence your relationship around issues
of sexual health and adolescence?
A: Attending the program with my daughter helped
normalize puberty, sexuality and the exciting changes
that were in store. The Teen Council peer educators
were great role models, and I remember how she
responded to their ideas with questions and ideas of
her own. I think the elementary school program helped
my daughter begin looking forward to puberty with
excitement instead of fear, so when it finally arrived
she took it on with some gusto. I think the program
cultivates emotional intelligence by providing kids
with a vocabulary and critical thinking. I see too many
negative feelings around sex (that parents are
perpetuating) out of a loving desire to protect their
kids. This often unintentionally ends up causing
confusion, fear and shame around something that
should be wonderful. Teen Council has given my
daughter and my family some great skills and aware-
ness of positive sexuality, and now she is empowered
to share that with the next generation.
To schedule an All About Puberty or other
Family Program presentation, contact
Planned Parenthood at
or 206-328-7715.
Or, visit
/
health-classes-at-swedish#All_About_Puberty
to register for an All About Puberty class
through Swedish Medical Center.
10 Tips for being an Askable Adult
STAY CALM. Take a deep breath and congratulate
yourself for being an “askable adult.”
Respect any and all questions. Validate the question
and the asker.
• “That’s a really good question. I’m glad you asked.”
Model acceptance and understanding. Resist arguing,
passing judgment or giving advice. Remember that your
tone, body language and eye contact also speak volumes.
Make sure you understand what your child is asking
by asking them a clarifying question:
• “Are you asking. . . ?”
• “To make sure I understand what you’re asking,
do you mean…”
• “Let me see if I understand what you’re asking about. . .“
Find out what your child already knows about
the subject.
• “That’s a good question. What do you think about. . . ?”
• “What do your friends think/say about…?”
Always make an attempt to answer. If it’s not a good
time, briefly explain why and get back to your child at the
first opportunity. If you don’t know the answer, say so.
• “That’s a great question. I actually don’t know
the answer.”
• Look up the information and get back to your child.
• You can also look up the information together.
“Let’s check this out together.”
For young children, use simple, but accurate terms.
Nicknames, slang terms and metaphors only confuse the
issue. Don’t exclusively talk about animals or plants when
your child has asked about people.
Avoid making assumptions or jumping to conclusions
based on the questions they’re asking. Many youth are afraid
to ask questions about sexuality for fear their parents will
assume they are sexually active. Ask clarifying questions to
find out exactly what they’re asking.
• For example, you could say, “that’s an interesting
question. Did you see or hear something that makes
you wonder about that?”
Practice answering difficult questions before they
are asked. Practice speaking terms you don’t yet feel com-
fortable with. Expect to feel shocked by some questions.
Remember you don’t have to immediately answer.
However, if you say you’ll get back to your child, make
sure you do so within a reasonable time frame.
Check in. Do they have more questions? Do they
have any feelings about what you’ve just said? Always
leave the door open for further communication.
• “Thanks for asking. Did I answer your question?”
• “How do you feel about this? Does this bring up
other questions?”
• “You can always come to me when you have
questions like this.”
Additional Resources
For parents/guardians:
/
For teachers:
health/personal/famplan/
educators/training.aspx
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